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A 75 year study (yes, 75 years!) by Harvard University shows that long life and happiness is reflected by strong relationships. This remarkable study is still going after all these years. Over 700 men started out being interviewed. Over 60 are still alive and in their nineties, and still being studied. It’s not money or fame that gets you a long and satisfying life, its good relationships. Loneliness is a killer. Family feuds take a terrible toll on the person that holds the grudges. A happy marriage adds years to your life. This is not rocket science- but it is social science. A real study over 75 years is hard to argue against. It’s not the first time I have heard this either. Dr JohnTrickell did a study of various societies around the world that lived the longest. His conclusion as to what brought long life? Fun, friends, family and faith. To have good friends throughout life is a blessing. To have a faith that brings about a friendship with Christ is even more precious. So, lean i...

A few years back I had the privilege of attending a pension’s event in Australia. (Stay with me- I know pensions is pretty much a ‘click to the next article’ subject). One of the guest speakers was Dr John Trickell. He was discussing longevity- a hot topic for us pension geeks! Dr Trickell said we had to start using the ‘F’ words – fun, family, friendships and faith. It is these four ‘f’s that give us long life. He went on to prove it with research and data. It makes sense. A good combination of a healthy lifestyle with lots of family and friends around. And linked to a real faith that there is more to life than just the latest paycheque or the newest gadget. (Which is why I HATE Black Friday by the way). So it was interesting to note a new article on the BBC website today, investigating a community that lives a lot longer- and a lot healthier- than most. They are a church community in California. Fun, family, friendships and faith. Try it. It works.

The first time Miss Turner noticed her, she stood quietly at the back of a group of girls. She and her brother were fairly new arrivals at Bulembu, their parents having died of AIDS. Nontando was a shy girl, Miss Turner thought. The girls were there to spend their merits. All the 400 rescued children were in school in Bulembu and merits were given for good work and good behaviour; rewards to spend. Miss Turner was particularly pleased to land the job of running the merit shop. She saw many of the children she cared for in the trauma unit- those that had been most deeply affected by their loss. And she saw Nontando. Each term, when the shop opened, Nontando came. And each term she stood with her friends, looking on as they spent their merits on sweets, books, toys and comics. But not Nontando. She just stood, quietly watching. ‘Hi Nontando, don’t you have any merits to spend?’ ‘Yes Miss.’ ‘So where are they? Where are your merits? What would you like? Sweets? A book maybe?’ ‘No Miss. I...

Most of our journey through life is made in small steps. What the writer Eugene Peterson calls ‘A Long Obedience in the Same Direction.’ A coffee here, a meal there. A conversation one day, a car journey the next. Small integral parts of life’s direction. Occasionally, a giant step comes along. For us two have come at once. The first is the start of KingsGate Community Church Leicester . Our first (amazing!) meeting was last night. As someone who had spoken often of the possibility of KingsGate planting a new church into Leicester, it is the realisation of a dream. And a giant step. The other giant step comes as we drop our youngest child, Lois, off at Heathrow later today, as she starts her long obedience in the same direction. She is travelling out to Bulembu in Swaziland to serve as a long term missionary. For us, it means an empty house for the first time, with the other three children having already moved away. Two giant steps. Two key moments in our lives. And fuel for the j...

Sometimes things don't go as we expect. But it's how we deal with those moments that make us or break us. We can choose to complain forevermore about what 'should' have happened. Or we can embrace the change. This is a short piece of prose from Emily Kingsley, a writer who's expectations changed one day. I'll let her tell you in her own words..... WELCOME TO HOLLAND by Emily Perl Kingsley. c1987 by Emily Perl Kingsley.   I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability - to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It's like this...... When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting. After months of eager anticipation...

There is no greater power than a community discovering what is cares about. Ask "What's possible?" not "Whats wrong?" Keep asking. Notice what you care about. Assume that many others share your dreams. Be brave enough to start a conversation that matters. Talk to people you know. Talk to people you never talk to. Be intrigued by the differences you hear. Expect to be surprised. Treasure curiosity more that certainty. Invite in everybody who cares to work on what's possible. Acknowledge that everyone is an expert in something. Know that creative solutions come from new connections. Remember, you don't fear people whose story you know. Real listening always brings people closer together. Trust that meaningful conversations change your world. Rely on human goodness. Stay together.                                     ...

I became a Christian when I was 15 years old. Since then, the Bible has been my companion. It’s been a good book to base my life on. More importantly, our nation is based on the Bible- on a set of Judaeo-Christian beliefs. It has been a good book to base our nation on. We don’t always get it right, but the belief system we have developed has served us well and given us solid foundations. I saw our Prime Minister on the news last night. With little thought to our foundations, he intends to remove one. The Bible is clear- marriage is between one man and one woman. That’s what our nation is based on and we have historic records to that effect. Marriage goes back to the dawn of time. Marriage in our nation is written into our laws. Over 3000 laws refer to it. Many would have to be rewritten to remove the terms ‘husband’ and ‘wife’. Cameron wants to change marriage. It’s not something that was in his manifesto. He has chosen to ignore the considerable reaction against his views. And, more ...

Her name is Rebecca and I saw her on Saturday. She is maybe 9 or 10 years old, but I guess with a mental age of an infant. Her chair was amazing. It kept her body from twisting and held her head upright. There was a big smile on her face as her father teased her and tickled her and cheered her on as she ate. Her name is Jessica and I saw her on Saturday. I guess she’s in her 20’s. Her race was amazing. She pulled away from the opposition to win the heptathlon gold. There was a big smile on her face as the crowd cheered her achievement. Jessica has her gold medal. One day so will Rebecca.

Lois, my 20 year old daughter, declared recently that she wanted to start running. I offered to buy her her first pair of running shoes. ‘You need running shoes?’ she asked. ‘Yes of course’ I said. ‘Why? What’s wrong with my plimsolls?’ I gave a wry smile the way only Dad’s can. A couple of hours later we were at Advanced Performance, the excellent running shop in Peterborough. It was only then that the full realisation of what was needed began to hit Lois. The first thing we saw was a guy in a shirt and tie running around the car park wearing new running shoes. ‘I’m not doing that! No way!’ ‘But you have to if you want the right shoes. They won’t sell you any shoes without you trying them out to make sure they are right for you.’ ‘Well I’m not running around the car park for any one!’ Half an hour later and with about ten pairs tried out and videoed on a running machine to check for pronation or supination (fancy terms referring to how your foot strikes the ground) and Lois was runnin...